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shit i'm making TONIGHT, episode 3

10/10/2012

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we're going a little loosey-goosey with this episode. because i did some weekend cooking, some weekend experimenting, and some weekend day-drinking. and it's wednesday. 

so, i have no fun pic of a bottle of wine to start with. i don't have finished pics of one dish. there's even going to be a whole second installment of one-off food blog to chronicle all of the things i did with food over the weekend. (and if you have a gross mind, get it out of my gutter.)

we're going to start with where i started: jalapeño deviled eggs and cilantro-lime chicken salad, both from my pinterest board, "shit i'm making TONIGHT" and soon to be seen on "i did it."

which one will i make again? both. which one first? the eggs. because i'd do things differently a second time around.
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first thing i'm gonna do is teach you how to boil an egg. yes, i know you THINK you know how to boil an egg. 

but, to be fair, i have an ex who didn't know how to boil water. he filled the pot to the brim and put it on a burner set to high. most of us know how THAT turned out. 

no, i'm going to teach you how to boil and egg without that strange green ring around your yoke. while i dislike the green ring because i think it makes for a dry yoke, it's also not aesthetically pleasing. and you see a lot of yoke in deviled eggs. so aesthetics are important.

get yourself a medium-sized pot with a lid. gently put 6 (or however many, it's 6 for this recipe) eggs into your pot and cover with water about an inch higher than the eggs.

why do we put the eggs in first and not the water? because people seem to acquire an irrational fear of water when dropping things into it and never let their fingertips get wet. so you tend to drop them in and crack your eggs when they hit the bottom of the pot.

why do we not bring the water to a boil before dropping in the eggs in? because the fear of water is rational at this point — as it's BOILING — and you're even more likely to crack your eggs.

put your pot on a burner at medium-high heat and bring to a boil. not a full-on rolling boil, but a baby boil. once you hit boil, put the lid on, turn off the burner and remove from heat. let it sit for 20 minutes. then run your eggs under cold water.

gently tap them all over on a flat surface and remove the shell. cut open. no green rings. perfect.
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jalapeño deviled eggs

you'll need:
6 large boiled eggs, cooled and peeled
1 jalapeño, deseeded and minced
3 tbsp mayo (i'd actually do less, see my notes at the end)
2 tsp chopped cilantro
1 tsp dijon mustard
1 teaspoon citrus champagne vinegar
the juice of a quarter of a lime
pinch cayenne pepper
pinch paprika
salt and pepper to taste
a plastic baggie

you'll notice i already switched out the vinegar and added paprika. the paprika was an accident, i grabbed the wrong jar. and the vinegar was what i had on hand and it worked.

but the addition of the lime juice was very purposeful. i just feel like if you're going to have cilantro and jalapeño, you gotta have lime juice. 

what you'll do:
cut your eggs in half lengthwise and remove the yokes with a spoon. mash the yokes in a bowl. like really well. 

add everything else to the bowl and mix. 

i put it all in a plastic baggie and kneaded it a little. then i cut off the corner of the baggie and used it to pipe the whole mess into my little egg boats.

i call them boats because the "deviled" was too runny. it formed lakes into my little boats and sunk them. the whole plate was deviled. (which was fine, as i have no shame in licking  palate. it's just not presentable. and deviled eggs are normally a presentation-type thing.)

what would i do differently? more yokes. less mayo. refrigerated the deviled baggie for an hour or two before piping into the boats.

and i AM going to try again, soon. they were totes good. i might even make me some paelo-mayo and try it like that.

what you're supposed to do is pipe it into the egg boats and refrigerate for an hour or more before serving. but i'm liking my refrigerate in baggie idea to let the deviled set a little. 

so, now i have an assload of cilantro. and another jalapeño. and lime. i should make cilantro-lime chicken salad.
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you'll need:
3 large boneless, skinless chicken breasts (if i were to do this again i'd do 2 large breasts and 2 thighs. i'll explain later)
chicken stock (recipe found here, subtract the lemon. or you can use what you have frozen or even store-bought.)
1 jalapeño, deseeded and minced
4 tbs chopped cilantro
the juice of one lime
one finely-diced red onion
1/3 cup mayo
1 tbs dijon mustard
1tsp cumin
salt and pepper to taste

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slice horizontally into the onion 4-5 times, leaving 1/4 inch intact
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slice vertically into the onion 6-7 times, leaving 1/4 inch intact
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slice down the onion, creating minced pieces. discard the remaining 1/4 inch
there are two things i'm going to teach you with this recipe. the first?

how to quick-chop an onion
1) peel your onion

2) cut off the ass-ends of your onion and discard

3) cut your onion in half

4) with a sharp knife, slice horizontally into the onion 4-5 times, leaving 1/4 inch intact (as pictured left)

5) now slice vertically into the onion 6-7 times, leaving 1/4 inch intact (as pictured left)

6) now, slice down the onion 7-8 times, creating minced pieces (as pictured left)

7) discard of the remaining quarter inch (or chop with wild abandon and incorporate into the minced pieces.)

how to poach chicken
in a medium-large pot, immerse the chicken in chicken stock.

bring it to a boil over medium-high heat. once it starts boiling, reduce the heat to a simmer and partially cover for 10 minutes. 

remove from the heat and let the chicken hang out in the stock for about 15 minutes.

after that, the rest of the recipe is pretty simple.

what you'll do:
use two forks pulling in opposite directions to shred your chicken.

put it into a large bowl with the rest of the ingredients (well, minus the chicken stock, obvi. the chicken stock you re/freeze for later.). stir it all around.

let it cool in the fridge for several hours before serving.
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now, while this recipe was so good it actually inspired me to make a sammy (and we all know my crazy aversion to all things bread.), it IS a little dry.

when i made my sammy i put mayo on the bread, even though most normal people wouldn't on a salad sandwich. and the tomatoes helped.

but it wasn't really a "needs-more-mayo" kind of dry, it was an "i-used-all-white-meat" kind of dry. next time i'll use some thighs, as noted earlier.

i have my first request. black chimichurri steak. i'll look into that and maybe this weekend try it out. if not, for sure next week.

follow my board, and remember: ALWAYS drink responsibly when you cook, you could lose a finger.

*all shitty photos taken with my iphone

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i don't watch madmen

7/19/2012

1 Comment

 
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but this is what i'd imagine don draper has for dinner.

an extra dirty belvedere martini with three olives, an extra large fillet mignon and an arugula salad.

why do i imagine that? it's what i have for dinner when someone else is paying for it.

but last night? i made it. here's how:

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first, the perfect extra dirty vodka martini. IMPERATIVE.

get a vodka you like. my favorite is actually three olives. but belevedere will do in a crunch. (i sound so snobby)

first, take a splash of dry vermouth and swirl it around your glass, coating the inside. then dump it out.

then mix ice (a handful), vodka (a 5 count) and olive juice (a drunken splash) in a shaker.

pour it, minus ice into your vermouthed glass. garnish with three olives and drink your face off.

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if you're still standing after your 'tini-tasm, it's time to make dinner.

first things first: heat a grilling pan over medium-high heat and a broiling pan in the broiler set at low.

OR, better first things first: bring your meat to room temp. seriously.

i like irish butter. so i take irish butter, a diced garlic clove, and salt&pepper and hand knead it into the meat.

then i sear the outside in the grilling pan — one minute per side.

throw it into the broiler for three minutes per side.

and it's time to make the salad.

i love arugula. and you KNOW i love cilantro. so i did greens of arugula with cilantro.

then added diced fresh banana pepper and red onion. then i spritzed it with the juice of half a lemon with a bit of citrus-champagne vinegar and olive oil. salt and pepper that shit, and you're good.

i cannot tell you how good this was. i licked my plate.
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"eat" is just "heat" minus an 'h'

7/17/2012

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what do you eat when the ac is out? something cold. that requires little-to-no cooking.

i made sweet corn salad.

roast 4 ears of corn in the oven at 350 degrees for 15-20 minutes. (by "roast" i mean cut off the kernels, toss in olive oil/champagne vinegar/salt&pepper and put it all on a cookie sheet.)

while it roasts, chop a half a red onion, a handful of cilantro, a clove of garlic, half a fresh banana pepper and two small deseeded tomatoes.

put the corn in with everything and toss it with the juice of a lemon/olive oil/citrus champagne vinegar/salt&pepper.

it's good and not hot.

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texas faux pho

5/8/2012

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texas faux pho: half vietnamese soup, half texan delight, all paleo diet — this dish will stick to your ribs but not to your gut ...

what you'll need:
3 lbs bone-in beef short ribs
32 oz beef stock
1 yellow onion
1 stick fresh ginger
1 bunch celery
2 (fresh) bay leaves
1 lemon
1 bulb garlic
1 bunch cilantro
1 container button mushrooms
1 bunch swiss chard
1 bottle of wine you think tastes good
3 limes
1 jalapeno
1 purple onion
1 head lettuce
1 heirloom tomato
champagne vinegar
avocado oil
salt and pepper (emphasis on the salt)

what you'll do:

first, you have to have a good cooking wine. it is absolutely imperative that you have something you enjoy drinking. this can be a long process.
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i already modified my own recipe. sue me. i got 1.5 lbs bone-in short ribs and 1.5 lbs boneless short ribs. why? that's what the harris teeter had. i like the bone-in because bone adds more flavor. for bone-in, bring them to a rapid boil (in just enough water to cover them) for five minutes and drain. see how it got all foamy? you want to get rid of that.
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peel your onion, but you don't have to the ginger.
dump the meat back in your pot with 4 quarts of water, 32 oz of beef stock (homemade or storebought) and the rest of the unboiled meat.

cut your yellow onion and ginger in half, lengthwise, and brown the cut edges in avocado oil over medium heat.

you really want to brown them, not soften them. this will add the best flavor, so pre-heat your pan.

once the pot's boiling, throw in the onion and ginger. turn it down to a simmer, cover and sit back for an hour.
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ok, so, here's my nifty little trick: eat a salad.

if you're like me, you left work at "normal" work-leaving-time and went to the grocery store and then put groceries away before ever even thinking about starting the soup and you're hungry.

so, let's make a salad. i like to theme my salads off what i'm making, so mine is pretty texan. but you can do what you want.

i washed and tore my lettuce, then finely chopped a quarter of my tomato and a couple slices of purple onion.

then i made a dressing of champagne vinegar, avocado oil, finely diced jalapeno and cilantro, lime juice, and salt and pepper. if it's too bitter, add a dash of sugar.


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after an hour, if you taste what's in the pot, you won't die. but you won't like it either.

wash and cut off the top portion of your bunch of celery, including the leave, and throw it in the pot with the bay leaves.

knife four holes in the lemon, after rolling on the counter with the heel of your hand until soft, and throw it into the pot whole.

peel the entire bulb of garlic. yes the entire bulb. and throw it in as well.

cover and simmer another hour and a half, or more.

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this is the point that it always gets dicey for me. i want this stock to taste great, but i haven't added salt yet. salt is so key. so i usually break down and put in a bullion cube or two. up to you.

strain everything out of the broth and return the broth to the pot. pick the meat out and discard everything else — after using tongs to squeeze the heated juice out of the lemon. shred the meat and throw it back into the pot.

wash and slice your mushrooms, once the stems are removed. throw them on into the pot.

i like cilantro. i know there are those people who's tastebuds have been tricked into thinking it tastes like soap. i feel bad for those people.

pick as many leaves as you want, give them a light chop and throw them into the pot. simmer another five minutes.

using just the leaves, wash and chop your swiss chard.

i use the entire bunch. you know how leafy greens cook down.

you're really supposed to throw them in the pot and stop cooking, based on any recipe i've seen. but, i like mine soft.

i also like my mushrooms soft and well-cooked.

so, i let it go until i'm hungry. and with that salad i had, it could be like 10-15 minutes.

don't judge.

the final step is the salt. i think it takes a lot. so much that the first time matt and i made this together, i got mad at how much he dumped in. then had to agree that he was right. (i hate that.)

so, salt to taste. a little pepper, too.
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this stuff'll keep in the fridge for about tow weeks. but, if you're cooking for one like me, freeze some.


when you're ready to serve, dice yourself some jalapeno and fresh cilantro and juice yourself so lime and put it in the bottom of your bowl.

scoop soup over it and clean your bowl.
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*all shitty photos taken with my iphone.
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    Rachel

    i'm an advertising copywriter who had this idea one day to blog. one-off blog, one day this and one day that. because i'm an expert at pretty much nothing, i figured i'd write about everything.

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