rachel writes on
  • rachel blogs
  • rachel writes advertising
  • rachel has adventures
  • rachel ryans

shit i'm making TONIGHT, episode 3

10/10/2012

0 Comments

 
we're going a little loosey-goosey with this episode. because i did some weekend cooking, some weekend experimenting, and some weekend day-drinking. and it's wednesday. 

so, i have no fun pic of a bottle of wine to start with. i don't have finished pics of one dish. there's even going to be a whole second installment of one-off food blog to chronicle all of the things i did with food over the weekend. (and if you have a gross mind, get it out of my gutter.)

we're going to start with where i started: jalapeño deviled eggs and cilantro-lime chicken salad, both from my pinterest board, "shit i'm making TONIGHT" and soon to be seen on "i did it."

which one will i make again? both. which one first? the eggs. because i'd do things differently a second time around.
Picture
first thing i'm gonna do is teach you how to boil an egg. yes, i know you THINK you know how to boil an egg. 

but, to be fair, i have an ex who didn't know how to boil water. he filled the pot to the brim and put it on a burner set to high. most of us know how THAT turned out. 

no, i'm going to teach you how to boil and egg without that strange green ring around your yoke. while i dislike the green ring because i think it makes for a dry yoke, it's also not aesthetically pleasing. and you see a lot of yoke in deviled eggs. so aesthetics are important.

get yourself a medium-sized pot with a lid. gently put 6 (or however many, it's 6 for this recipe) eggs into your pot and cover with water about an inch higher than the eggs.

why do we put the eggs in first and not the water? because people seem to acquire an irrational fear of water when dropping things into it and never let their fingertips get wet. so you tend to drop them in and crack your eggs when they hit the bottom of the pot.

why do we not bring the water to a boil before dropping in the eggs in? because the fear of water is rational at this point — as it's BOILING — and you're even more likely to crack your eggs.

put your pot on a burner at medium-high heat and bring to a boil. not a full-on rolling boil, but a baby boil. once you hit boil, put the lid on, turn off the burner and remove from heat. let it sit for 20 minutes. then run your eggs under cold water.

gently tap them all over on a flat surface and remove the shell. cut open. no green rings. perfect.
Picture
jalapeño deviled eggs

you'll need:
6 large boiled eggs, cooled and peeled
1 jalapeño, deseeded and minced
3 tbsp mayo (i'd actually do less, see my notes at the end)
2 tsp chopped cilantro
1 tsp dijon mustard
1 teaspoon citrus champagne vinegar
the juice of a quarter of a lime
pinch cayenne pepper
pinch paprika
salt and pepper to taste
a plastic baggie

you'll notice i already switched out the vinegar and added paprika. the paprika was an accident, i grabbed the wrong jar. and the vinegar was what i had on hand and it worked.

but the addition of the lime juice was very purposeful. i just feel like if you're going to have cilantro and jalapeño, you gotta have lime juice. 

what you'll do:
cut your eggs in half lengthwise and remove the yokes with a spoon. mash the yokes in a bowl. like really well. 

add everything else to the bowl and mix. 

i put it all in a plastic baggie and kneaded it a little. then i cut off the corner of the baggie and used it to pipe the whole mess into my little egg boats.

i call them boats because the "deviled" was too runny. it formed lakes into my little boats and sunk them. the whole plate was deviled. (which was fine, as i have no shame in licking  palate. it's just not presentable. and deviled eggs are normally a presentation-type thing.)

what would i do differently? more yokes. less mayo. refrigerated the deviled baggie for an hour or two before piping into the boats.

and i AM going to try again, soon. they were totes good. i might even make me some paelo-mayo and try it like that.

what you're supposed to do is pipe it into the egg boats and refrigerate for an hour or more before serving. but i'm liking my refrigerate in baggie idea to let the deviled set a little. 

so, now i have an assload of cilantro. and another jalapeño. and lime. i should make cilantro-lime chicken salad.
Picture
you'll need:
3 large boneless, skinless chicken breasts (if i were to do this again i'd do 2 large breasts and 2 thighs. i'll explain later)
chicken stock (recipe found here, subtract the lemon. or you can use what you have frozen or even store-bought.)
1 jalapeño, deseeded and minced
4 tbs chopped cilantro
the juice of one lime
one finely-diced red onion
1/3 cup mayo
1 tbs dijon mustard
1tsp cumin
salt and pepper to taste

Picture
slice horizontally into the onion 4-5 times, leaving 1/4 inch intact
Picture
slice vertically into the onion 6-7 times, leaving 1/4 inch intact
Picture
slice down the onion, creating minced pieces. discard the remaining 1/4 inch
there are two things i'm going to teach you with this recipe. the first?

how to quick-chop an onion
1) peel your onion

2) cut off the ass-ends of your onion and discard

3) cut your onion in half

4) with a sharp knife, slice horizontally into the onion 4-5 times, leaving 1/4 inch intact (as pictured left)

5) now slice vertically into the onion 6-7 times, leaving 1/4 inch intact (as pictured left)

6) now, slice down the onion 7-8 times, creating minced pieces (as pictured left)

7) discard of the remaining quarter inch (or chop with wild abandon and incorporate into the minced pieces.)

how to poach chicken
in a medium-large pot, immerse the chicken in chicken stock.

bring it to a boil over medium-high heat. once it starts boiling, reduce the heat to a simmer and partially cover for 10 minutes. 

remove from the heat and let the chicken hang out in the stock for about 15 minutes.

after that, the rest of the recipe is pretty simple.

what you'll do:
use two forks pulling in opposite directions to shred your chicken.

put it into a large bowl with the rest of the ingredients (well, minus the chicken stock, obvi. the chicken stock you re/freeze for later.). stir it all around.

let it cool in the fridge for several hours before serving.
Picture
now, while this recipe was so good it actually inspired me to make a sammy (and we all know my crazy aversion to all things bread.), it IS a little dry.

when i made my sammy i put mayo on the bread, even though most normal people wouldn't on a salad sandwich. and the tomatoes helped.

but it wasn't really a "needs-more-mayo" kind of dry, it was an "i-used-all-white-meat" kind of dry. next time i'll use some thighs, as noted earlier.

i have my first request. black chimichurri steak. i'll look into that and maybe this weekend try it out. if not, for sure next week.

follow my board, and remember: ALWAYS drink responsibly when you cook, you could lose a finger.

*all shitty photos taken with my iphone

0 Comments

wait. why did rachel blog a craigslist listing (below)?

8/22/2012

1 Comment

 
i HAVE to tell you more about my adventures in apartment hunting. first of all, i saw two very promising places yesterday and have more lined up with the same people today. you don't have to worry about me at all, monday was a fluke.

BUT, i DO have more funness to share. let me tell you all about it ...

i called "will" at like 8:45 in the morning, and it sounded like I woke him up. it also sounded like he could have possibly been in the company of one infamous mary jane. (no judgement.) i asked for a 5:45 showing and he offered 6. but he was weird. i read him the title of the Craigslist posting and all he said was, "price?" like that's how he identifies his properties. he said it was still available, but that I had to meet him at his office.

so i decided to bring a friend. it just seemed too sketch. HE seemed too sketch.

we get there (119 w 23rd at 6th ave, suite 300) and it's this room full of people on computers, on phones, milling around. they sit us down with this guy steve and he gets my basic info like location, pricepoint and number of bedrooms. he acts all excited about the possibilities that he's pulling up on his computer but not showing us, then he hands us off to will.

i'm still trying to figure out if that's the guy's real name.

will takes us on a magic tour around the city looking at shithole after shithole. will is tall. like lurch tall. like uncomfortably tall. and he walks fast. and doesn't talk. i kept trying to bring him out of his shell, and he just wasn't having it. once he even dared a "donotcrosswalk" and lost us. he'd made it all the way to the next block before he figured out we weren't with him.

i asked him if he'd ever lost anyone before. he said, "everyday." WOW.

so, the first place he showed us was in a basement. with graffiti on the windows. it had terra-cotta  outdoor tiles on the floor and access to a "garden space" that was really a dumping ground for broken furniture. um, no.

the next place was nice. first floor. pretty spacious. lived in by a SLOB. the bathroom was nice, but gross. i thought things were looking up. until I realized that there was no stove. no oven. no cooking apparatus at all.

that's when I asked Will how many were left on the list. there were four more. i asked him how many of them he'd seen. he pointed to the one we'd just been in and the one we were standing in. he said that most people don't come in with my budget. he said most people were looking to spend $1200 to $2000.

i asked him what the apartments he usually showed were like. he just laughed. creepy.

the next two places were identical. once we found them. will got a little turned around and we did some backtracking. the largest thing about them were the kitchens. the kitchens were SWANK. the bathrooms were nice. everything was new and fresh. but the livingrooms were hallways and the bedrooms were closets. literally.

there was plenty of room in the kitchens, but there were doors (to the outside, closets, the bathroom) everywhere, so you couldn't put furniture in them. crazy. i even laid down in the floor of the bedroom, and with my feet touching the wall, i couldn't extend my hands over my head all the way. and that was length-wise. double crazy.

oh, and one of them had a lovely view of a cemetery. with a fresh grave.

the next two places had already rented earlier in the day, and by that time I was cranky and hungry, so we parted with will. when we did, he shook my hand and wiggled his eyebrows suggestively at me. AWESOME.

so, that was an adventure. and i'm glad i took a friend.

oh, and the listing i blogged? never saw it. i don't think it exists.
1 Comment

$2200/1br-~*@LOOK HERE@*GIGANTIC*1BR*24 HRdm/ELE/LAN LUX BLDG*SUBWAY*ASAP OR 9/1 (Chelsea)

8/22/2012

0 Comments

 
~*@LOOK HERE@*GIGANTIC*1BR*24HRdm/ELE/LAN LUX BLDG*SUBWAY*ASAP OR 9/1

~*THE HEART OF CHELSEA*~


AVAILABLE FOR IMMEDIATE OR 9/1 MOVE-IN

GLEAMING HARDWOOD FLOORS,IMPOSSIBLY HIGH CEILINGS,BRAND NEW STAINLESS STEEL APPLIANCES, 1 BLOCK FROM MULTIPLE SUBWAYS, THE PERFECT LOCATION!!!

SCHEDULE A PRIVATE VIEWING NOW


CALL / TEXT

WILL: 212-470-4816or EMAIL: WillK1groupNYC@gmail.com
Picture
LIVING ROOM
Picture
BEDROOM
Picture
DOORWAY/FOYER




THESE PICS ARE 100% ACCURATE AS I TOOK THEM MYSELF!! COME SEE FOR YOURSELF!!

SCHEDULE A PRIVATE VIEWING NOW


CALL / TEXT

WILL: 212-470-4816or EMAIL: WillK1groupNYC@gmail.com


Battery Park City · Bowery · Carnegie Hill · Chelsea · Columbus Circle · East Harlem · East Village · Financial District ·Garment District · Gramercy Park · Greenwich Village · Harlem · Hell's Kitchen · Herald Square · Inwood · Lenox Hill · Lincoln Square · Little Italy ·Lower East Side · Lower Manhattan · Marble Hill · Meatpacking District · Midtown Manhattan · Morningside Heights · Murray Hill · NoHo · Nolita ·Roosevelt Island · SoHo · South Street Seaport · South Village · Sugar Hill · Sutton Place · Times Square · TriBeCa · Union Square · Upper East Side ·Upper West Side · Washington Heights*Uptown*Downtown*Midtown*brooklyn*queens* west village


 

  • cats are OK - purrr
  • dogs are OK - wooof
  • Location: CHELSEA
  • it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
  • Fee Disclosure: Broker Fee Apartment
  • Listed By: Best Apts NYC

PostingID: 3218479455
0 Comments

rachel's quote of the day

5/8/2012

0 Comments

 
too good not to share: our art buyer quite innocently said to a room full of women, "i just don't know if i can pull out of her." he meant a contract.

of course, my mind went straight to the gutter ...
0 Comments
    Picture

    Rachel

    i'm an advertising copywriter who had this idea one day to blog. one-off blog, one day this and one day that. because i'm an expert at pretty much nothing, i figured i'd write about everything.

    email rachel
    get rachelwriteson in your inbox

    RSS Feed

    Archives

    August 2016
    March 2013
    February 2013
    January 2013
    December 2012
    November 2012
    October 2012
    September 2012
    August 2012
    July 2012
    June 2012
    May 2012
    April 2012

    One-Off Topics

    All
    2012
    21 Jump Street
    2girlsonedate
    9/11
    Acne
    Adult
    Advertising
    Agency
    Alexa
    Alice Bag
    Amuche Bouche
    Andrea
    Angry Typing
    Anonymity
    Apartment
    Apocalypse
    Autumn Sling
    Bacon
    Bad Boy
    Bathroom
    Batshit
    Battitude
    Bette Midler
    Bills
    Blog
    Boiled Eggs
    Boobs
    Boogers
    Book Review
    Bored
    Box
    Bramble 75
    Brown Butter
    Calendar
    Catfish
    Cats
    Cat Scratch Fever
    Caviar
    Cece
    Celebrity Blog
    Celine Dion
    Cellphone
    Channing Scale
    Channing Tatum
    Chicken Stock
    Cilantro
    Cilantro-lime Chicken
    Cinnamon
    Cockroach
    Cold
    Collard Greens
    Collards
    Contract
    Cookbook
    Cooking
    Craigslist
    Crazy
    Crazy Stupid Love
    Creamy Lemon Chive Zucchini
    Dad
    Daria
    Date
    Dave On Wheels
    Dawson's Creek
    Day One
    Decoy Bride
    Devil
    Deviled Eggs
    Dmv
    Drinking
    Dumbassery
    Emails
    Emma Stone
    Emoticon
    End Of The World
    Facebook
    Facebook Stalk
    Fail
    Fashion
    Fatback
    Faux Pho
    Fmlh
    Forcefield
    Four Horses
    Fuckyousandy
    Funny
    Geographically Single
    Get You Killed
    Gin
    God
    Googled
    Google Stalk
    Gosling
    Green Ring
    Greens
    Growing Up
    Gutter
    Halloween
    Hangover
    Hashtag
    Hector Elizondo
    Hey Girl
    Honey Boo Boo
    Hovels
    How To
    Hunter Dunn
    I
    I
    I
    I Did It
    Iphone
    Iron Man
    Island
    I Voted
    Jalapeno
    Jalapeño Deviled Eggs
    Jfk
    John
    Joke
    Jorts
    Judge Me
    Juli
    Julibox
    Justin Timberlake
    Ladies
    Ladies Room
    Lays Sour Cream And Onion Mashed Potatoes
    Lays Sour Cream And Onion Potato Chips
    Leggings
    Lemon
    Lemon Chicken Soup
    Lemon Parsley Brisket
    Lemon-pork Rice-noodle Soup
    Lie
    Life
    Life Hack
    Lime
    Linkedin Stalk
    Liquor Luge
    Loss
    Love
    Manalytics
    Mashed Potatoes
    Mattism
    Mayan
    Mayans
    Measure
    Meme
    Michael Jackson
    Mid-soup Salad
    Mimic
    Mira Sorvino
    Missing
    Mixipe
    Mom
    Monday
    Moonwalk
    Mouse
    Movember
    Move To New York
    Movie Quote
    Movie Review
    Mullen
    Mustache
    Mustachioed
    Myspace
    Nessie
    Never Forget
    New Year
    New Years
    New York City
    New Yourk City
    Not Welcome
    No Worries
    Nutty
    Nyc
    Old
    One Off Blog
    One-off Blog
    Oral
    Paleo Diet
    Palmetto Bug
    Pawpaw
    Penis
    Petey
    Pg
    Pink Cheeks
    Pinkdustar
    Pinterest
    Poaching Chicken
    Pollyanna
    Ponder
    Poop
    Potato Cakes
    Potato Chips
    Power
    Power Rangers
    President
    Procrastinate
    Prophet
    Punk Feminist
    Quick Chop And Onion
    Quote
    Rachel
    Rachelazd
    Rachelexicon
    Rain
    Recipe
    Roasted Garlic
    Roommates
    Ryan
    Ryan Gosling
    Salad
    Saratoga
    Sasquatch
    Savory Stuffed Chops
    Sayings
    Scam
    Scary
    Secret
    Secret Service
    Sex
    Sexiest Man Alive
    Shit I'm Making TONIGHT
    Single Brothers
    Skypacommuting
    Small Spaces
    Social
    Social Media
    Someplace Fairly Uncomfortable
    Something To Hold Onto
    Sommelier
    South Carolina
    Southern
    Southern Collard Greens
    Space Planning
    Spaghetti Sauce
    Squashed Pot Bake
    'stache
    Stalk
    Statussing
    Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles
    Texas
    The John
    Top 10 Lists
    Top 12 Of 12
    Twitter
    Two Men Need Wedding Dates
    Two Women Need Two Men Needing Wedding Dates
    Unadult
    Vajayjay
    Vice President
    Vote
    Voting
    W4m
    Wedding
    Win
    Wine
    Women
    Woodsy
    Words
    Worries
    Writing
    Yet
    Young
    Youtube
    Yum
    Zelda Rubinstein